Thursday, June 26, 2014

Do I have a choice?

I was reading an article by Australian Comedian, Josh Thomas today about gay pride: Read it here. It really resonated with me. I am quite often praised for parenting two children with special needs, having a job, and studying. Well sometimes I am called crazy as well but that is besides the point. I don't see parenting my special needs children as a choice I made. I mean, yes I decided to have children (sorry if that offends those who believe children are Gods will) but I didn't have much control in the children I got. I often see parents of children with ASD determined not to allow ASD to be used an excuse for their child and many of us spend a great deal of time redirecting our children from manipulating situations because of their ASD (kids will be kids ASD or not), so why would I allow ASD parenting to define, limit, or excuse me for anything. I take on what I know that I can handle and my kids can handle and if I am not meeting those obligations I consider my situation and try to make changes. I have not always done this and I do believe that every now and again it is okay to ask: "WHY ME!?" However, cathartic it might be, you won't get an answer and you certainly won't change your situation. I am determined not to lose myself to ASD parenting and I don't think I would be a wonderful role model for my children if I did that. So now I am about to re-embark on my crazy life, I'm going back to work and starting a PhD but I have allies, support, and the strength to do it. If any one of those three things changes then I will cross that path when I come to it.